Childhood Matters - Homework Headaches

On October 30 check out the Childhood Matters radio talk show program on 98.1 KISS FM from 7:00-8:00am. The topic for Sunday, October 30 is Reducing Homework Headaches. Here is a blurb for the show:

Reducing Homework Headaches
October 30, 2011

98.1 KISS FM

7:00-8:00 am

Our children face great pressure to exceed and excel each year, starting at a very young age. One example is that the amount of homework students are assigned is increasing steadily. Join Nurse Rona and guest host Beth Samuelson, MA, of Student Organizational Services, as they discuss how to help students balance their workload and work smarter, not harder! What do you think about how much homework your child has? Do you think it helps them learn?

I thought I'd give some advice on the topic here since I won't be able to listen in that day because I'll be out of town (coincidentally) helping my son tour a school that will hopefully be less stressful for him and a better fit than the school he currently attends.

1. How do we help students balance their workload and work smarter, not harder?

Balance is key. Sign up for fewer extra curricular activities so that children are not stressed out after a day at school. Give your child the gift of unscheduled time every afternoon after school. Then, don't fill that time with hours of homework, but with other unstructured activities - hanging out with siblings, cooking, dog walking, bike riding, chilling with friends, park play time, drawing, coloring, street roller hockey, naps, etc. Once they are rejuvenated or rested from those after school activities they may have a better mindset to do a little homework.

2. What do you think about how much homework your child has?

We always focus on the amount of homework our children get. And, for good reason, because it can tend to dictate our family evenings and weekends. So, for younger children, parents need to stick to a realistic amount of time for doing homework. Even though there's no basis in research to support this, a generally accepted rule of thumb is 10 minutes per grade level per school night. So, a first grader should do only 10 minutes of homework per night and a 6th grader, 60 minutes.

And, we need to focus on the quality of the homework, too. So, if your third grader is doing 30 minutes of homework that is too difficult or too easy for him, you may write a note to the teacher at the top of the page explaining, and hopefully the teacher will adjust the work for your child. Many teachers will be receptive to making individual changes. It's perfectly acceptable to write, "My child worked on this for 30 minutes and was completely lost so I asked her to stop."

When your children get older (middle school) I find the parents can still be involved, but less so than in elementary school as far as giving their input into the homework load/quality. And in high school, your child needs to advocate for himself. The parents should be completely hands off of homework at this stage. By this point the student needs to take complete ownership of his work, grades, successes and failures.

3. Do you think homework helps your children learn?

We learn everyday in life in many ways. So yes, of course, sometimes students will learn something beneficial from a homework assignment. But, I would ask, does it get them excited about learning? Does it prompt them to ask questions and try to find answers themselves? Does it make them curious, creative, capable, cooperative learners? Often it doesn't. Often it kills the joy in learning. Often it is meaningless to them at that specific time in their lives.

If it feels meaningless, feel empowered to ask the teacher why she/he assigned a certain assignment. Or, encourage your child to ask the teacher. If the teacher is open, she will listen to feedback from parents and students. If not, just encourage your child and know that it is ok to agree with your child when they moan about a boring assignment. I usually look at the assignment and agree with my boys, "Yes, that seems pretty ridiculous. Is it helping you learn more about the subject?" And leave it at that. Don't add, "But you have to suck it up and do it because that's life and life isn't fair. Deal with it." That type of attitude just adds fuel to the fire. Just agree with your child when he is frustrated at the amount of time spent on a homework assignment or irritated with the type of assignment. You are not disrespecting the teacher, you are agreeing with an unfortunate situation. You might also add, "Well, is there anyway you can make this assignment better? What if you talked to the teacher, what would he say?" And let it go. You will be amazed at how much ownership they will take if you don't nag them to do their homework.

Also, remember the homework is your child's, it is not YOURS. Don't say, "We have to do homework now." Let her own it. As your children get older, it can prompt a lot of good discussions about boring, routine tasks and other typs of jobs that are meaningful in life.

And, one last thing. Read. Reading is the best "homework" your child can have. If your child is young, read to them and with them. Children relish uninterrupted reading time with anyone who will be there for them - siblings, parents, grandparents, friends, etc. If your child is older, talk to her about the reading she is doing. Model reading. Encourage reading. Read.

Any other thoughts? What are your comments about these questions?

Challenge Success Conference - Sept 25, 09

Check out the Challenge Success Website (http://www.challengesuccess.org/)

Our children live in a high-stakes, high-pressure world.

Today, a young person's success is too often measured by easily-observed symbols: trophies, grades, test scores, and acceptance into prestigious schools. Expectations once reserved for a small group of exceptional students are now expected of many.

Our children are experiencing unacceptably high levels of anxiety disorders, depression, substance abuse, suicide, poor physical health, and disengagement from learning. Unrealistic achievement pressure contributes to these problems.

Our children are not prepared for the challenges of the 21st century.

Educators, mental health professionals, and business leaders agree that the pursuit of a narrow vision of success often leaves young people lacking the skills most needed to thrive in a rapidly changing world--adaptability, interpersonal and collaborative skills, and the ingenuity and creativity to solve complex problems.

About Our Conferences

Challenge Success offers dynamic conferences for schools, parents, and youth to come together to address issues of student health, school engagement, and academic integrity. All conferences take place at Stanford University, where school teams comprised of principals, teachers, parents, counselors, students, and other community members work together to create site-specific plans for school reform.

Our Challenge Success Annual Fall Conference takes place in September and includes a Friday night plenary session that is free and open to the public. Keynote speakers are experts in child development, medicine, psychology, public health, college admissions, and/or education. These experts are joined by a panel of student speakers who offer personal viewpoints on academic stress and coping strategies.

Challenge Success/SOS Conference:

Our Fall 2009 Conference will take place on September 25-26, 2009.

Fall Plenary Session Free and Open to the Public

Friday September 25, 2009

Memorial Auditorium, Stanford University, 7:30 pm - 9:30 pm

Introduction:

Denise Pope, Ph.D., Co-founder, Challenge Success/SOS, Stanford University School of Education Senior Lecturer, and author of “Doing School": How we are creating a generation of stressed-out, materialistic, and miseducated students. http://www.amazon.com/Doing-School-Stressed-Out-Materialistic-Miseducated/dp/0300098332/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1252434758&sr=1-1

Keynote Speakers:

Michael Thompson, Ph.D. is a consultant, author and psychologist specializing in children and families. He is the clinical consultant to The Belmont Hill School and has worked in more than five hundred schools across the United States, as well as in international schools in Central America, Europe and Asia. He and his co-author, Dan Kindlon, wrote the New York Times best-selling book, Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys (Ballantine Books,1999). In addition, Dr. Thompson is the author of several other acclaimed books, including Best Friends/Worst Enemies: Understanding the Social Worlds of Children(Ballantine, 2001) and The Pressured Child: Helping Your Child Achieve Success in School and in Life (with Teresa Barker, Ballantine, 2004).

Chris Kelly is the Chief Privacy Officer and Head of Global Public Policy at Facebook, guiding Facebook’s efforts to make the Internet a safer and more trusted place. He has previously served as Chief Privacy Officer at three other Internet companies, Spoke Software, Excite@Home, and Kendara, and was an attorney in private practice at Baker & McKenzie and Wilson Sonsini Goodrich and Rosati. Chris also served as a policy advisor in the Clinton Administration. He was Editor in Chief of the Harvard Journal of Law and Technology and part of the founding team for the Berkman Center for Internet and Society.

Panelists:

Madeline Levine, Ph.D., Co-founder, Challenge Success/SOS, and clinical psychologist and best-selling author of The Price of Privilege.

Three Students will offer their perspectives on primary stressors and coping strategies in middle school and high school.

To RSVP for the Friday night session, go to:

http://www.challengesuccess.org/Events/Conferences/Fall/PlenarySessionRSVP/tabid/1016/Default.aspx